One verse.
One obscure, could be forgotten verse from Isaiah. That’s all it took to bring me to my knees in a not-so holy prayer.
One verse.
Forty words. One hundred and sixty-five letters. And my heart was shattered into 1,000 pieces. Oh, my heart was already fragile. Already broken and delicately pieced back together. Like the finest of china, broken, and loving pieced together by a skilled craftsman.
I screamed at Him. Silent heart cries spilling forth, my face covered with a pillow so no one could hear. No one, but Him.
I used to pray and beg God to tell me what it is He wants me to learn. When life is impossibly hard, and circumstances break me to the core, I just want to learn the lesson and move forward. And I’ve had many tear-filled nights wondering how in the world I can discover what it is I am supposed to be learning.
And then, the gentle nudging of the Holy Spirit, quietly drawing me to a verse I don’t remember reading before this day. There is no way I could prepare myself for the storm that arose from nowhere, like a dangerous thunderstorm on a cloudless day.
And I knew, without doubt, without fear, and without hesitation. I knew the lesson that He is so painfully teaching me.
Rejoice.
Lord, don’t ask this of me. I can surrender. I can submit. I can let go. But please, please don’t ask me to rejoice.
Instead of rejoicing I worry. I worry about the what ifs, instead of having faith in the what is.
God is…
faithful
merciful
slow to anger
rich in love
jealous
holy
crazy in love with me
And yet my heart is prone to wander. Wander into the dangerous, but comfortable place of worry and fear.
I know the lesson. Oh that it would not be a life-long lesson. And oh that He would get the glory from this achingly painful and personal journey.
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Small Business Challenges
Q & A with my sponsors
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RDD: As a business owner, what is your biggest challenge when it comes to dealing with customers, and how do you deal with it?
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@aroyaldaughter
Christian Lifestyle Blogger + Inspirational Writer. Web, Blog, & Graphic Designer.
Amy Adams in Enchanted = still one of my favorite characters to watch. - 52 mins ago
Latest posts by Amanda (see all)
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Love your post. Why is it that we expect God to ask us to do the hard painful things and then are surprised when He asks us to rejoice? Sometimes it is only me who asks me to do the hard things – not God at all.
I’m not sure I have a link worthy post but I will be joining in from the reader side. Oh to rejoice in the hard things. Often times it is so much easier to say it than act on it. Your post was wonderfully written, pricked my heart in many ways. The fullness of God’s love and concern over our lives brings me to my knees. Loved this and love you my dear! Keep speaking, God is moving through you!
Beautiful post, Amanda. I listened to a sermon series on Job a couple years ago. The pastor focused on not asking “why” but “who”. Who is in control? God. He kept driving the point, focus on God’s characteristics instead of trying to figure out why. So much easier said than done…just like it’s easier to say I will rejoice than to rejoice from my heart.
(The post I wrote for today is kinda on the same lines…being broken and frustrated with God. Interesting timing, eh?)
I can totally relate to focusing on the worry and fear and what could be instead of the what is! I need this reminder daily.
I’m excited to link up today with this series
Beautiful. Love you.
Thank you for being an example of authenticity in following Christ.
rejoicing is definitely hard when the storm clouds are hovering above us. I get you, I’ve been there way too many times.
It’s difficult, but I pray that God keeps nudging at your spirit with what He wants you, what He wants us to learn, because His lessons although painful at times, are the most beautiful to learn. hugs, friend.
Thank you so much for writing this dear friend. The Lord showed me through your post that my heart has been in the wrong place lately. I have been focusing so much on the things that are wrong in my life rather than the blessings He’s given. I think He is also teaching me how to rejoice and recognize blessings. Beautiful post dear. Thank you for opening your heart this way.
Linking up some behind the scenes peaks this week – thanks for inspiring and hosting
Sarah @ A Cat-Like Cusiosity
As the apostle John said in his old age, I also have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth. Reading this post granted me yet another hearing. Be blessed, darlin’ girl. You are a blessing to many.
I second that!
What a beautiful post – so hard to rejoice in our lives, even during the worst moments. I too am prone to wander into the awful territory of worry (and doubt). Thankfully, God won’t give up on either of us! Blessings to you!
I love the colors! Wonderful pictures!
-meandmr.com
Beautiful post and photos. Love it.
This post brought me to tears as I have been living with about the worst imaginable from my husand leaving to losing my business to losting my home and losing all sources of income for the past 9 years. I keep hoping that today will be the end of all of this but it goes on and on. But, in all of this, I can rejoice as I know that without God in my life I would not have made it. He has truly blessed me in ways that I could never imagine. My friends have been there for me and I am wealthy in friends – first time ever in my entire life. He has blessed me with the ability to sew so that I can try and make my ends meet in the same month. He has blessed me with good health. He has blessed me beyond measure. Sure, I want to know why all this pain and suffering and plan on asking Him when I see Him. Another way he has blessed me is thru people like you and others in the blogosphere with the same heart and soul and with inspiration to go on. I thank you for being there for people like me.
I can’t believe I didn’t know you before the conference friend! I love your sweet heart and your honesty in your writing.
Can’t wait to get to know you more after meeting you =)
Much Love!
L